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Showing posts from August, 2013

Games

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Short jokes

Girl: Do you believe in puppy love?
Boy: I tried it once, but their assholes are too small. Husband says; "When I'm gone you'll never find another man like me".
Wife replied; "What makes you think I'd want another man like you!" When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness. A woman walks up to a guy in a blue bathing suit and says, "Did you know your eyes match your swim trunks?" He says, "Why? Are my eyes bulging?" "I told my wife that a man is like a fine wine... I always get better with age. The next day, she locked me in the wine cellar." Innkeeper: The room is $15. a night. It's $5. if you make your own bed.
Guest: I'll make my own bed.
Innkeeper: Good. I'll get you some nails and wood. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In t…

Slang Definitions

Abra-Kebabra
A magic act performed on Saturday night, where fast food vanishes down the performer's throat, and then shortly afterwards, it suddenly reappears on the taxi floor.

Aussie Kiss
Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.

Back End of the Bat Mobile
The state of your Brass Eye soon after you eat a really hot curry. "I had a Ring Stinger in the Benghazi restaurant last night, and now I've got a dose of Gandhi's Revenge. My arse feels like the back end of the Bat Mobile."

Beaver Leaver
or Vagina Decliner. A homosexual.

Beer Coat
The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise at 3 in the morning.

Beer Compass
The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after a booze cruise, even though you're too pissed to remember where you live, how you get there, and where you've come from.

Bone of Contention
A hard-on that causes an argument. e.g. one that arises when a man is watching Olympic beach volleyball on TV with his girlfr…